Whether you are a cheater or been cheated on, cheaters won’t stop cheating in 2018. In a new report, Ashley Madison, the #1 website worldwide for married dating and affairs, polled 4,000 of its users to identify the top New Year’s resolutions among those with extramarital partners. Here are the top-3:
34% say increasing the amount of new experiences with their extramarital partner
31% say being healthier by eating better and exercising
13% say spending more time with their extramarital partner
Bottom line: The Ashley Madison data reveals that cheaters are planning more adulterous fun in the New Year. At the end of the day cheaters are quite content with how their relationships (well, at least one of their relationships) are going and don’t need a resolution because of it. In this survey, 65% of respondents say they are either having an affair or pursuing an affair, of which 73% already have one extramarital partner, with 27% having multiple partners now.
Planning a New Year’s resolution is something that people do when they want to make a positive change in their lives, a change to make them happier, says Isabella Mise, Director of Communications for Ashley Madison. Our members are showing us that they are already happy or on a pathway to finding happiness and that’s why they don’t feel the need to make a New Year’s resolution.
Is getting into shape one of your new year’s resolutions? Don’t give up. Getting in shape is a big resolution each year and Ashley Madison , the world’s leading married dating website, surveyed its members to find out if their extramarital relationships motivated them to live a healthier lifestyle by exercising. The survey results show that cheaters are more likely to stay in shape while in an extramarital relationship.Here are key takeaways from their study:
52% say their spouse isn’t fit and 58% say they wish their spouse exercised more
70% say that their extramarital relationships actually motivate them to stay fit
12% of women (vs. 9 % of men) use the excuse of ‘going to the gym’ to meet their extramarital partner
The findings also go into the top exercises that turn people on (male vs. female) and much more. Check it out below:
Nearly half (41%) of respondents exercise 2-5 times per week and 80% consider themselves to have an average level of physical fitness. But it’s not the new year’s resolutions that are keeping cheaters fit, 70% of survey respondents say it’s their extramarital relationships that motivate them. This goes both ways as 71% consider their extramarital partner to be fit and/or seek an extramarital partner that is fit. Not surprising because let’s face it, healthy is sexy.
But if they’re in search of someone who is fit, does this mean their spouse doesn’t fall into this category? The answer is yes with 52% saying they don’t consider their spouse to be fit and 58% saying they wish their spouse exercised more often.
Working out or “Working out”?
Gyms are noticeably busier in January, bringing new people together and more wandering eyes. In a previous survey of Ashley Madison members, going to the gym was the fifth most common excuse for men (9%) and women (12%) when planning to meet with their extramarital partner. However, in a recent survey done of Ashley Madison members, when cheaters do go to the gym 73% say they are there strictly to exercise and not to seek an extramarital partner. Moreover, 72% are not likely to exercise with their spouse or their secret partner.
Even though they aren’t consciously seeking an affair at the gym, it doesn’t mean there aren’t certain exercises that work as a turn on for gym goers. The top exercise that turns people on most is yoga/stretching (51%), followed by squats (19%).
Top exercises that turn people on the most when someone else performs them
Yoga/stretching – 51%
Squats – 19%
Other – 13%
Bicep curls – 6%
Stationary bike – 3%
Other – 26%
Yoga/stretching – 22%
Bicep curls – 19%
Squats – 16%
Tricep pull-down -7%
Jump rope – 5%
Stationary bike – 3%
Lunges – 2%
Pilates Machine – 1%
Yoga/stretching – 59%
Squats – 20%
Other – 9%
Stationary bike -3%
Lunges – 3%
Jump rope – 2%
Bicep curls – 2%
Tricep pull-down – 1%
Pilates machine – 1%
*Survey of 1,112 members of Ashley Madison between January 3, 2018 – January 4, 2018.
** Survey of 1,491 members of Ashley Madison between October 4, 2017- October 13, 2017.
Ava Miles, who has recently released a new series of non-fiction books, is helping women let themselves be more comfortable expressing their inner goddesses. Miles shares with us on how to handle and what to say when someone hurts our feelings through her series “The Goddess Guides to Being a Woman.” If you read “Goddesses Don’t Do Drama: Removing Toxicity from Relationships,”which is one of the books from the series, it helps people get through relationship moments when they are feeling hurt or angry.
It takes courage to go from hurt to healing. What’s one of Ava’s secrets in knowing what to say when someone hurts your feelings? Transforming unhealthy relationship patterns.
According to Miles, many of us never learned how to express anger and sadness. Sometimes that may be the case because we are encouraged not to do so. We simply don’t know how to say things kindly when we’re upset. And sometimes it can make us physically ill and unhappy.
“You don’t have to walk away or wait until after the ‘f*ck you’ to speak your truth,” says Miles. It all begins with recognizing and removing victim/perpetrator language from the conversation.
What Is Victim/Perpetrator Language?
Here are some examples:
It’s all your fault.
You did this.
You’re to blame for this.
You’re not giving me enough.
This isn’t good enough.
You’re not pulling your weight.
Victim/perpetrator language is the language of drama. In order to get to the open-hearted, honest, loving communication we all crave — we need to begin to recognize and move away from the raised-voice or talk-to-the-hand variety. Ava invites us all to try our hand at goddess-woman language by using statements such as:
What I think I hear you saying is…
This is hard for me to say, but I’d like to share this with you…
This doesn’t feel very loving or kind to me.
I want to understand.
My feelings are my responsibility.
I take responsibility for my part in _______.
“Goddess women use words that convey love, compassion, kindness, affirmation, and honesty,” says Miles. “Sure, we all have moments when we might not be able to package our feelings and thoughts into a big red bow, and that’s okay. We can be honest about that too.”
Have a pre-teen or teenage daughter(s)? Let’s talk about sex. What are you telling your daughter(s) about sex? Ava Miles, author of the book series “The Goddess Guides to Being a Woman” discussed with us about the important points to make when talking about sex:
What Are You Teaching Your Daughter About Sex?
According to surveys conducted by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy, teens say parents are the biggest influence when it comes to their decisions about sex. What are parents telling their kids about sex? What are they telling their daughters?
Female sexuality is taboo in cultures and societies throughout the world but should we convey those views to our daughters. Miles encourages parents to look at the language they use around sexuality with their children, specifically their daughters. Here are some questions parents should ask each other:
Are you using fear-based language?
Are you using shame-based language?
Are you talking about sex as something purely functional?
Or are you sharing information about how sex can be fun, joyful and connected?
When talking with your daughters about sex, have the focus be on developing them into strong women who practice healthy sex and overall happy lifestyle. Positive sex lives begin with how parents present sex to their daughters and sons.
Miles wants all women and girls to identify with their innate goddess nature, and part of that entails creating joy and comfort around their own sexuality. You can learn more about how to start and continue the discussion by visiting AvaMiles.com.
About Ava Miles
Ava Miles is an international bestselling author with a B.A. in Rhetoric and Technical Writing as well as Spanish. She also has two graduate degrees, one in International Peace Studies and another in Political Science.
Using her degree, Miles spent many years traveling the world and sharing her gifts with women and men in war-torn countries, helping them to rebuild and reintegrate their communities amidst intense struggle. She has managed multi-million-dollar projects and multi-national teams of people in the private sector, in non-profits and in domestic and international agencies as well as multilateral organizations such as the United Nations.
Now, she brings that experience together with her passion for sparking joy and personal success in people’s lives, launching an all-new series of life-fulfillment books called “The Goddess Guides to Being A Woman.” With seven books in total, “The Goddess Guides” invites readers to reimagine what it means to be a modern woman—on their own terms.
No matter social status, race, gender or religion, we all experience relationship challenges from time to time but there’s a hidden cause behind relationship drama and a way to end it once and for all.
International bestselling author Ava Miles, whose brand new book series “The Goddess Guides to Being a Woman” was released in August to discuss ways to remove relationship drama. Many people say they want less drama in their lives, but how many of us are actually able to identify when we are active participates on the drama and make a different choice to avert that drama?
Miles states the underlying cause of relationship drama is victim/perpetrator language … it is its own communication style, a negative style of communication. The core of the language uses guilt, shame, and manipulation to bring about desired results —classic perpetrator-style. It objectifies the parties involved, casts blame and takes no personal responsibility, and creates explosive and intractable conflict in relationships. It divides couples and prevents them from having loving interactions with others, including the people in our own family, home life, workplace, and community.
If you are living in a drama-filled relationship battered by toxic communication, you have to recognize what is going on. Here are the common strategies or phrases people use in relationships that continuously feed on drama:
* You never do anything special for me
* You always say you’re going to do it and then you don’t
* You always forget about me
* You’re not giving me enough
* You’re not pulling your weight
* This isn’t good enough
* I need more from you
* I want more from you
* This isn’t working
* I need you to do better than this
Miles says, “Goddess women speak differently. The words we use not only convey our deepest feelings and thoughts, but also our divine nature. As a goddess woman, we want to use words that are loving and kind because it’s who we truly are. We speak from our hearts. We allow ourselves to be vulnerable when saying something doesn’t come easily, when it’s a little scary to share this much of ourselves.”
Here are some examples of goddess woman language:
* I feel…
* That makes me feel like…
* What I think I hear you saying is…
* This is hard for me to say, but I’d like to share X with you…I’m not sure how to say this…
* I want to share with you
* I want you to share with me
* Can we be totally honest here?
* This doesn’t feel very loving or kind to me
* I want to understand
* My feelings are my responsibility
* I take responsibility for my part in X
International bestselling author Ava Miles calls herself a divine rockstar—something she believes everyone is deep down. With a B.A. in Rhetoric and Technical Writing and Spanish and two graduate degrees, one in International Peace Studies and another in Political Science, Ava Miles spent many years traveling the world and sharing her gifts with women and men in war-torn countries, helping them to rebuild and reintegrate their communities amidst intense struggle. She has managed multi-million-dollar projects and multi-national teams of people in the private sector, in non-profits and in domestic and international agencies as well as multilateral organizations such as the United Nations. Now, she brings that experience together with her passion for sparking joy and personal success in people’s lives, launching an all-new series of life-fulfillment books called “The Goddess Guides to Being A Woman.” With seven books in total, “The Goddess Guides” invite us all to reimagine what it means to be a modern woman—on our own terms.
Highly recommend listening to R & B Singer Melissa Sharee’s song “Deception.” It gives an honest story telling of romance and deceit. All genres ages 21 – 65 can definitely relate to the song. Let us know your thoughts on Deception by leaving a comment on the Youtube video.
Tax Day is just around the corner and Plenty of Fish (POF), one of the largest global online dating companies, surveyed 3,000 singles across the U.S. to uncover the finer points of taxes and finances.
Only 11 percent of singles said they spend their tax refund, while 65 percent said they like to save some and spend some
When it comes to dating and money, 22 percent of women said they would not date someone who makes less money than them
More than 85 percent of singles said they tell the truth about how much they make, and fewer than 2 percent make less money than they claim to make
38 singles spent their tax refund on a tattoo, with women out-inking men 22 to 16
Additional data and findings are available on this infographic, including the craziest things singles have spent their tax refund on (download graphic here).
Savvy Spenders and Savers
Nearly 26 percent of men said they save their tax refund, compared to less than 20 percent of women.
More than 34 percent of baby boomers save their tax refund, making them almost twice as likely to save their refund than any other age group.
When asked about the craziest thing singles have spent their refund on, write-in responses from them ran the gamut between practical and NSFW – and highlight a Mars versus Venus divide.
Car Parts: More than 190 men claimed their craziest tax return spend was on a car – the highest response by far.
Vegas Baby: Vacations made the top three, but Las Vegas hit the jackpot – 27 men and 8 women claimed this popular destination as their “craziest tax refund spend.”
Get Inked: 38 singles got tattoos with their refund, with women out-inking men 22 to 16.
Honorable Mention:24k gold grill for teeth, 10 gallons of beef jerky, skydiving lessons… and a horse.
Fast and Informed Filers
Twenty-eight percent of singles file their taxes in January, as soon as they get their forms, while fewer than 10 percent of singles said they file on Tax Day.
The fastest filers are 20-somethings: 35 percent said they are likely to file as soon as they get their forms, versus only 18 percent of baby boomers
When asked how they would rate their understanding of the tax filing process, 23 percent of singles said they had excellent knowledge, 34 percent said good and 33 percent said average.
Additional Tax Takeaways
On average, only four percent of men and women have looked at a partner’s tax return behind their back. Coming in at around five percent, men 35-44 and women 45-54 are most likely to peek.
The percentage of singles who have charitable write-offs increases in every decade of life – with only 27 percent of twenty-somethings taking advantage of this tax write-off, versus 54 percent of baby boomers.
More than five percent of men and almost eight percent of single women don’t file taxes.
For Most Singles, Money isn’t Everything
A whopping 89 percent of singles said they would date someone who made less money than them.
Women tend to be less forgiving on the financial front. More than 96 percent of men said they would date someone who makes less money than them, but nearly 22 percent of women said they would not date someone who makes less money than them.
Women 26-34 are most likely to date someone who makes less than them (83 percent), compared to other female age groups.
For those ready to dive deep into financial conversations on their next date, Plenty of Fish can be downloaded for free from the Google Play and iTunes stores. For more details on the survey view here.
About Plenty of Fish (POF)
Plenty of Fish (POF), a Match Group (MTCH) company, is one of the largest global online dating companies. Available in 11 languages and more than 20 countries, Plenty of Fish has more than 100 million registered users, with 65,000 new users signing up every day. Unlike many dating offerings today, POF is all about having great conversations. In fact, singles have more quality conversations on POF than any other dating app, which can lead to stronger connections, smarter matches and better dates. For more information, please visit here or download POF from Google Play or iTunes.
Abodo, an apartment search platform, interviewed 3,500 college students to uncover how and why they use the dating site Tinder and other dating apps that revealed surprising results. To see the full report, read ‘Swipe Right for Love?’.
37% of men DO NOT think using dating apps while in a relationship is cheating.
31.5% of female app users said they would NEVER hook-up on a first date.
9.4% of male app users said they would NEVER hook-up on a first date.
84% of college students prefer Tinder over any other dating app.
91% of college students are primarily NOT using the apps for hook-ups.
27% say that they’ve been sexually harassed on dating apps (Grindr and OkCupid report the highest rates).
Thoughts on the Survey
It surprises us at Fromgirltogirl how many college students prefer to use Tinder because that particular dating app is for hook ups for the most part. We assumed there would be more of a balance of hook-up culture and wanting a monogamous relationship but the survey indicates less people are looking for just hook ups. A finding that did not surprise us were the number of men using dating apps and not considering it as cheating while in a relationship. We feel this is accurate because men define cheating differently than women. We have even heard men define a need for sexual interactions with multiple partners while in a relationship as something fun to do – not thinking how it could emotionally or physically harm a significant other. As for women saying they would never hook-up on a first date, we believe that is based on not wanting to be seen as too promiscuous versus not having the thought to hook-up on a first date.
A physically attractive person that one enjoys the company of is hard to resist. It is a temptation from the start because it’s desire. Just because a woman says she would never hook-up on a first date, it doesn’t mean she wouldn’t if the opportunity came into fruition. However, we do feel more men in comparison to women would jump at the chance to hook-up on a first date. More shockingly, we are shocked that 91% of college students are not using dating apps for hook-ups. Are students looking for steady dating but lost hope in face-to-face first introductions? It is definitely something to look more into. Chat with Fromgirltogirl on Facebook and Twitter to let us know what works and doesn’t work for you when using dating apps. What is your primary reason for using dating apps? We would love to hear from you.
A new survey reveals that women would be willing to go without sex, gain 10 pounds or take a pay cut in order to get clear skin. Think that’s surprising? The survey also found women will cancel a date or plans because of a zit, would rather have their period than a breakout on their wedding da. The average woman is willing to go as far as editing their selfies to cover their skin before posting pictures on social media. This survey is the Curology‘s State of Acne in America, which polled more than 1,000 women between the ages of 18-44 who have suffered from acne, blackheads or clogged pores at some point in their lives and the results are shocking.
Sorry, Bumble: Almost 15% of women between the ages of 18-24 are likely or very likely to cancel plans or a date because of a breakout.
Period on your Wedding day: 59% of women said they’d rather have their period than a breakout on their wedding day
Selfie Cover Up: 40% of women admitted to editing a picture to cover a blemish before posting on social media. When looking at women ages 18-24, the number goes up to 52.6%.
How Far Would You Go? Almost half of women 18-24 (44%) would be willing to gain 10 pounds, take a pay cut or be celibate for six months to have clear skin.
Find the full survey results for an inside look into women’s emotional, social and professional struggles caused by acne and explore what they would be willing to sacrifice for clear skin.
The Dermatology crisis of America
There are less than 10,000 dermatologists in the United States and more than 50 million people suffering from acne, access to quality care can be limited while the desire to conquer breakouts and end skincare stress is widespread. Curology, the skincare company that offers customized prescription acne care for every customer online, released its inaugural survey on the State of Acne in America.
The survey provides a comprehensive look at the challenges women face when dealing with acne and highlights how far women of all ages are willing to go to achieve clear skin. The survey was conducted online with Google Consumer Surveys among 1,001 women, between the ages of 18-44, who have suffered from acne, blackheads or clogged pores at some point in their lives.
Curology is the only solution that offers customized acne formulas for each customer. A dedicated dermatology provider reviews photos of each customer’s face and analyzes responses to medical questions before prescribing a tailor-made formula. Each formula has prescription-strength ingredients not available over-the-counter, and Curology ships the personalized formula directly to the customer’s door.
The Purpose of the State of Acne in America Survey
“Our hope with the State of Acne in America survey is to expose the underlying struggles women face when dealing with their acne and understand just how important it is for them to find an effective treatment,” said David Lortscher, MD, board-certified dermatologist and the founder and CEO of Curology. “This survey validates what our dermatology providers hear from customers every day – that acne is more than just skin deep. Changes in the appearance of the skin have a major impact on a person both socially and emotionally – and that’s why I created Curology.”
Wearing Your Emotions
Suffering from unwanted acne, blackheads or clogged pores can be challenging for women of all ages. In many cases, social situations can exacerbate the emotional toll acne takes and brings unwanted commentary.
A staggering 52% of women 18-24 have had a significant other or family member comment on their acne, blackheads, or clogged pores in a negative way. With the palpable pressure of having clear and photo-ready skin, women of all ages are willing to subject themselves to other burdens to avoid a very public breakout.
Acne and the Workplace
Women who suffer from acne, blackheads or clogged pores also struggle with nerves and feelings of anxiety in the workplace, potentially putting their professional reputation and future at risk.
36.6% of women admitted to feeling nervous or anxious going into a job interview or big presentation because of their acne. The nerves increase even more for younger women, with 40.6% of women 18-24 admitting the same feelings of anxiety.
52.4% of women who have had someone close to them comment on their acne in a negative way also admitted to having felt nervous or anxious going into a big presentation or job interview.
A Financial Blemish
Whether it’s taking a pay cut at work or shelling out $100 a month, the prospect of achieving clear skin can drive women to sacrifice well-earned money.
Of women 18-34 who said they would be willing to take a pay cut for six months to have clear skin, 57.9% would be willing to pay $100/month for 10 years ($12k) to guarantee their skin would be cleared of any acne, blackheads or clogged pores for life.
20.5% of women would be willing to pay $100/month for 10 years ($12K) to guarantee their skin would be cleared of any acne, blackheads or clogged pores for life. That number jumps to 26.4% for women 18-24.
Do you hope for a better sex life? Are you no longer attracted to your partner? If yes, you may be carrying emotional resentment in your body. Energy Healing Educator & Program Developer Natalie Nelson uses her new Body Code expansion “Resonating Relationships: The Energy of Romance” to identify and heal the issues that are shutting you down and turning you off to your partner.
Is Resentment Making Your Partner Less Attractive to You?
True intimacy between partners takes trust and mutual feelings of safety. Holding onto past emotional traumas, however, can block us from being open to giving and receiving love. Some example sources of emotional trauma include:
Infidelity, whether from your current partner, a previous one or even from what you witnessed with your parents
Experiencing abuse, whether as a child or an adult
Witnessing abuse as a child or adult
Death of a partner or any other loved one
“These are just some of the traumas people experience that begin to shut us down when it comes to love,” according to Natalie. “And from there, resentment can build between partners… resentment over mismatched sexual desire, money issues, parenting disagreements and more.”
When she found herself in a failing marriage, Dr. Brad’s daughter Natalie Nelson—an integral part of this thriving family business—became inspired to create the “Resonating Relationships” to help those in challenging relationships to heal themselves so they could show up more fully and openly in their partnership.
“Resonating Relationships” is made up of two parts: an evaluation guide and a session guide. During the evaluation portion, people answer a series of questions that pull personal details about their past and their experience of love and relationships into the conscious mind. In the session portion, the practitioner uses The Body Code (which includes The Emotion Code) to address and heal specific disharmony as it relates to relationship issues manifesting within the body.
“Having struggled in relationships myself and seeing a lot of people I know struggle in their relationships,” says Natalie, “I got really frustrated because I believe it shouldn’t be so difficult. So much of the reason why we struggle is because there are things going on inside of us that we’re just not aware of. We’re all just kind of feeling around, blindly trying to find some kind of balance in our relationships. With ‘Resonating Relationships,’ you can identify specific issues that you may never have honed in on before and bring them into consciousness. It taps into things that, for most people, have largely been unexplored.” For more information visit DrBradleyNelson.com and EmotionCode.TV.
About Natalie Nelson
Energy Healing Educator & Program Developer Natalie Nelson has spent more than 15 years studying, experiencing and teaching the powerful healing that is possible through The Emotion Code and The Body Code, created by her father, Dr. Bradley Nelson. A key member of this highly successful family business, Natalie brought The Body Code and The Emotion Code teachings into every aspect of her life. When she found herself in a failing marriage, she became inspired to create a new Body Code expansion program to help those in challenging relationships—including herself—to heal. Whether you’re single, dating, in a committed relationship or married, Natalie’s new system, “Resonating Relationships: The Energy of Romance,” can affect powerful change that heals individuals and couples from the inside out. In addition to being a certified and experienced Body Code and Emotion Code practitioner, Natalie is the facilitator of the official Body Code mentorship program where she guides and supports more than 3,000 practitioners. She currently resides in Salt Lake City, UT