By Briana Booker
Life is about adaption, acceptance and rejection. Sometimes we have to evaluate our lives in order to see what’s dragging us down and what’s uplifting us to be better people and do better things for ourselves and others. One necessary action, from time to time, is removing toxic relationships from our lives.
Toxic relationships can infiltrate every part of our lives if we allow them to have unchecked power. Toxic relationships know no boundaries and find pleasure making your life one huge festival of misery. The worst types of toxic relationships are toxic friendships and toxic romantic partners.
What are toxic friendships?
Toxic friendships are relationships where the word ‘friend’ is used liberally but those given the title take everything while giving nothing. These friends also require high demands of you but sets low standard for what they will bring to the relationship. In fact, those relationships are not friendships but situations where those titled as friends are really master manipulators. In no shape or form are these people willing to accept and follow through on the concept of giving and taking.
If this sounds like friends you have in your life, immediately drop the relationships like it’s hot. This includes removing their telephone numbers from your contact list and not arranging outings with these low lifes. It doesn’t matter if you have common friends. Real friends will always make time to interact with you at different times and not stir up gossip.
Eventually they will get the message you no longer want to continue the toxic friendships. Results: They will find another victim and leave you alone or they will mature and become a real friend.
Bottom line: Don’t wait for anyone to treat you better because if people wanted to be a good friend to you…they wouldn’t be inconsiderate. Good friends are simply good friends. They don’t make excuses for being bad friends.
Don’t be available to those who lack commitment. Be too committed elsewhere to participate in toxic friendships. Eventually, you will meet real friends.
Speaking of being too available, remove that toxic romance out of your life as well. Yes, all romantic relationships have ups and downs but there comes a time where lack of commitment and lack of desire to resolve problems becomes intolerable. Arguments should never surpass a couple of days. Silent treatment should never be tactic to “win” an argument.
In romantic relationships, it’s about working through problems together and enjoying the good times together. No shape or form should one put in more effort than the other in making the relationship work. Checks and balances are a necessity.
If your relationship has any degree of emotional or physical abuse, you need to end your relationship with the person in a public place. Try a coffee shop or outdoor gathering.
Most egoistical people hate looking unfavorable in public so the person won’t make a scene. If you need to arrange to pick up any of your stuff, bring several people with you. This is for your safety. Don’t be foolish. You don’t know what state the person may be after the break up.
Once the break up is official and you have no personal property in the previous significant other possession, don’t take any text messages, emails or calls from the person. If the person threatens you, file a police report.
Remember people don’t change into better people unless they want to change into better people.
Move forward and never look back. These relationships are called toxic relationships because they are bad for physical, mental and spiritual health. Love yourself enough to know you can and will do better.
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