I was talking to some Black women a day ago. I asked what do you think could make Black communities thrive. There was a majority consensus that we need Black men to lead our communities. We need men that help raise our children not just donate sperm or be emotionally distant fathers & spouses( I know it might have been done to us but you should always thrive to do better for your offspring). Yes, the community is bruised but not broken. Change for the better is possible. Greatness starts with courage and persistence. Although Black women can be excellent parents, we can’t do it alone anymore…not if we want to revive these communities. & above all Black women need to respect themselves. A man will walk all over you and disrespect you when you settle for less than love and respect. You do not have to be rude and abuse a man to get love and respect. You just have to appreciate him and also have the courage to respectfully tell him to step up. This is the wake up call and I’m not sugar coating. And trust me… Black men we do want to see , you,the Black men as the real, positive leaders of the Black community. We won’t know greatness until we know your worth & our worth. Stop putting each other down and start working together. Slavery and slave mentality is over.
Women Empowerment: Let Him Lead In Love
You can be a new-live independent woman & still let your man take the lead in your relationship sometime. It is a sign of affection and signals you want & need him around. Do notlet your ego get the best of you.
Love Yourself Enough to Walk Away From Being The Side Chick
Love yourself enough to walk away from being the side chick. You are worthy of REAL love.Valentine’s Day,TOMORROW, IS YOUR DAY TO SET YOURSELF FREE IN STYLE. Don’t be afraid of the unknown. Don’t be taken advantage of anymore. If you haven’t been made a priority…the person won’t ever make you one. Love yourself enough to walk away.
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Jobs On The Rise
Private sector job growth has increased! 3.2 million jobs in the last 23 months thanks to the Obama Administrative. Jobs On The Rise!
Own Your Voice To Get What You Want
As a woman, I am starting to learn if I want power over my personal and professional success I need to own my statements. I need to give my voice power. Young girls are taught to speak in a voice tone that is favorable to anyone and everything. It makes us come off timid and prevents us from getting what we want and need in romance and in our careers. So what is the solution? You can speak up for yourself but know when it is better be silent and listen, listening gains you wisdom about the situation. It will never lessen your power. Being the loudest and most arrogant can make you lose power rather than gain it. You can not win every battle, especially when it come to romantic conflicts. Pick your battles wisely. And most of all only apologize once, if at all. You do not have to apologize for having an honest opinion. You should apologize only once at the least and most, if you stated your honest opinion in a disrespectful way. Follow the golden rule. Be assertive( powerful verbals help but like, maybe, I think this might do not work) and do not be a bitch who has to have it her way or no way at all. When you take the bitch way, I can guarantee both your romance and career success will falter. – Briana Booker
The White Minority
By Aria Grabowski
I am a white girl, born in America. Although I have lived in a relatively diverse area my whole life, I always was in the majority. In many ways this left me oblivious to what it means to be a minority, to be surrounded by people that do not know what it is like to have the hair of a white person. This all changed when I started my Peace Corps service and my new nickname became white girl.
I moved to a community where I was the only white person. For some of the people in the community, I was the only white person they had ever talked to in life.
In my community most people were filled with questions and amazement about my whiteness. Yes, my scalp is really white like paper. No, my hair did not come from a doll. Yes, I turn red if I stay in the sun too long. Yes, if you press my skin it will briefly change color. I do not know why my veins are that color and no I do not poop white.
At first, I found the questions, poking, and petting extremely annoying. I do not think anyone wants a stranger on the bus touching their hair. But then I realized these actions were usually not coming from a place of hate or malice. It was coming from a lack of knowledge.
I quickly realized that I not only represented Americans and the Peace Corps. I also represented white people. I needed to do everything possible to help people understand that all white people are not tourists, rich, greedy, or cheap. Not all white women are easy. We are different from black people physically. So when people asked me questions, no matter how crazy, I tried to be patient, understanding and answer questions.
Even with all my attempted patience and understanding, I realized in some way it affected how I viewed interactions with people, especially people I did not know well.
I frequently found myself thinking someone was treating me in a certain way because I was white. If a guy hit on me, I just assumed it was because I was white and a possible visa. This view came from receiving more marriage proposals from strangers than I could count. It also cam from the phrase ‘I like to see your color’ being a frequently used pick-up line. Obviously, every guy I met was not interested in that, but how could I tell?
There were other times people would try to charge me more for things and I always assumed this was because I was white. The people thought I did not know better. They thought I was rich so it was okay to rip me off. But maybe these were honest mistakes?
Then there were times people would ask me to buy stuff for them. Again, I just assumed it was because I was white and by default rich. If I did not buy, I would be labeled cheap and greedy.
As time went on, it occurred to me that their actions may not have had to do with my whiteness. It may have been based on the fact that it seemed like I had my life together, and by default, must have money.
I started to notice that I had a slight chip on my shoulder about being treated differently just because I was white. I was never certain whether I was treated this way because I was white or I was not white. It made me realize how hard it must be for minorities in the states – always wondering if that interaction was due to race and never being able to know if it was or was not.
Sadly, from my experience it seems like the only thing that can be done, is to get thick skin. Try to be patient and understanding. Try to fight ignorance, no matter how exhausting and hard it may be. I hope that one day things will be different. Granted that is easy for me to say because my experience being a minority lasted only 2+ years and for the most part did not have hatred attached to it.
By Aria Grabowski
Aria Grabowski wrote this article to discuss her experience being a minority for 2+years.She served as a peace corps volunteer in St. Lucia from Feb 23 2009-May 28 2011.
Fromgirltogirl Discussion: How do you think we can promote more patience, understanding, and acceptance of different cultures and people in communities around the world?
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The Year of The Weight Lifter
strongBy Briana Bookerv/strong I came to the realization that I am no longer 17 years old. My body is not as fast as it use to be. My body is not as slim as it use to be. But here I stand as the best woman I have ever been thus far. I guess it is true, looks are not everything. Although I am aging, I still want to keep up my health and appearance. I will never be someone that settles for letting myself go. I love myself. With that said, I would like to push myself to be better than my previous self by dedicating a few hours weekly to weight lifting. I am working on my core, which I notice is not as fit as it use to be. The love of my life ( or I would like to think he is the love of my life) thinks my new found curves are beautiful but I want the 17 year old me to travel with the wonderful woman I am becoming now. Who knows, I might just surpass the 17 year old me. I am up for the challenge. Stay tuned.
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Lessons on the Go
If you have a dream, you have to protect. If you want something, go get it. Period. Repeat daily. Never be afraid to fail because you learn to succeed through the stepping stones of failure. Oh and lastly, never make an excuse for why you cant accomplish what you set out to do. Stay positive and greatness will follow. 🙂
How To Be Slim And Trim in 2012: Drink Green Tea
Are you looking for a way to lose a few pounds this year without endangering your health? If yes, you will be happy to hear it only takes a few sips of Green Tea to get started!
Green tea is great for your skin health and it is made of disease fighting antioxidants! To lose weight with Green tea, drink it with meals that are topped with black pepper. The antioxidant that fights against fat is called EGCG that is contained in green tea. It can reduce your body fat by 130% if you regularly drink green tea.
So what are you waiting for? Drink up!
For more lifestyle enrichment tips, news, community empowerment,advice, and freebies visit our website Fromgirltogirl.com !